I know that some people actually enjoy the experience of grocery shopping, but I have a problem. Let me explain.
I don’t know about you, but I’m not particularly fond of grocery shopping – for several reasons, some of which include:
I lose a few hours of my time that I could be using for other, more fun, activities like doing laundry or washing dishes.
I have to spend a large amount of my taxed income to buy food that I get to pay more tax on.
I have to lug the groceries from the store to the car, from the cart to the trunk, from the trunk to the house, to the refrigerator, the freezer, and cabinets.
I feel compelled to spend the next half hour cleaning the fridge out before I put the new food in there.
Then I feel guilty about all the food I just threw away from the last shopping trip!
The very worst part of grocery shopping, though? The part that makes me break out in a cold sweat before I even leave the house? The fruit and vegetable aisle.
I start getting anxious a few aisles away. I tell myself “this time it will be better”. I try to stay positive. The very first time I pick up an apple and go to put it into one of those flimsy, tissue paper- thin plastic bags, I realize I’m wrong. It’s not better this time. Why, oh why, can’t I open these bags? What is wrong with me? I try to peel it apart… nothing. I rub it between my fingers and thumb… nothing. I try both hands… nothing. I look around, just knowing that people are staring at me, judging me, because I can’t open the bag. The ONLY way that I have found to make it work is to use water. I can’t lick my fingers and do it, though, because my fingers have now touched every single germ in the entire store. What to do? Here’s my solution to this problem.
Grab a bunch of bags, separate them into individual bags, and saunter over to the refrigerated section of the produce department. Try to be casual about it; pick up a pepper, examine it, pick up something else. Try not to look creepy. Wait for the automatic sprinklers to come on and stick your hands under it to get them completely wet. Grab your individual bags, open them all at once and calmly finish your business of produce shopping.